You probably have a few people in your life who are terrible at really listening to you. Terrible at considering anyone’s feelings but their own. Terrible at accepting they were wrong or at fault—about anything. At the same time, these people are very good at telling lies—big or little. Good at crossing boundaries you’ve set. Good at manipulating everyone’s attention so that it’s always on them.
They’re toxic people, right? They’d never tell you things like “If you were a stock in the stock market, I’d certainly buy you.” Instead, you’re likely to hear “Why are you so stupid? You never do anything right. You ain’t sh*t.”
Navigating around toxic people used to be a big challenge for me. But after years of practice, I’ve finally mastered managing them. That practice began after a therapist offered me great advice about the “three kinds of people,” then gave me a solution for navigating around the toxic kind.
In this episode I share tips on how to:
- Limit your interaction with toxic people . . . even in those difficult cases when they happen to be family members
- Share pleasantries and ten seconds of small talk to diffuse tensions, then bid the Toxic One adieu
- Create that powerful feeling of walking away from the Toxic One, knowing that you ran the show
- Avoid directing your energy toward pettiness
- Choose kindness over other options, and not worry if someone thinks you’re a wimp for doing so
- Find constructive substitutes for the truths you really want to speak